The county of Lancashire is well known for its monologues. Although a lot of customs and traditions have gone by the wayside, there are still some singers trying to revive them. Some are doing this by writing material in the old tradition. I learned this monologue from a popular Lancashire group called The Five Penny Piece.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
PETE BROWN AND THE PARROT
\nby
\nBill Froggatt<\/p>\n
Pete Brown was an animal lover;
\nHe went out of his way to be kind;
\nBut he once had a row with a parrot
\nThat near sent him out of his mind.<\/p>\n
On his way to the factory in t\u2019 mornin\u2019
\nPast a pet shop each day he would walk;
\nAnd as he passed t\u2019 window, a parrot
\nThese words of alarm it would squawk:<\/p>\n
“I know abaht thee!” – most offensive;
\nIt gave poor old Pete quite a turn,
\nAnd he wondered how t\u2019 parrot had managed
\nHis innermost secrets to learn.<\/p>\n
Well this, it went on for a fortnight,
\nTill the whole thing was getting absurd;
\nSo at last he went into the pet shop
\nAnd said “How much do you want for yon bird?”<\/p>\n
“It\u2019s nobbut for sale,” said the pet man,
\n“That parrot is private, it\u2019s mine.”
\n“I\u2019ll gi\u2019 thee ten pound,” Pete persisted
\n“Nowt doin\u2019, \u2018twill never be thine!”<\/p>\n
So he left feeling rather downhearted,
\nAnd then, on the very next day
\n“I know abaht thee!” shrieked the parrot,
\nAs the pet shop he passed on his way.<\/p>\n
So, back to the shop and the pet man:
\nPete offered him one hundred quid!
\n“It\u2019s nobbut for sale,” said t\u2019owd fellow,
\n“Not even if a thousand you bid!”<\/p>\n
“But seeing you\u2019ve been so persistent
\nAnd for t’ trouble to which you have been,
\nT\u2019 parrot laid a big egg this morning
\nYou can have it for three pounds fifteen.”<\/p>\n
Pete took the egg home and he warmed it;
\nEach day for a crack he would watch;
\nAnd soon all his care was rewarded
\nAs the offspring o\u2019 t\u2019 parrot did hatch.<\/p>\n
While passing the pet shop next morning
\nHe braced himself, ready for t\u2019 cry;
\n“I know abaht thee!” said the parrot,
\nAnd fixed him with its evil eye.<\/p>\n
Pete stopped, and turned round to the parrot,
\nHe gave it a withering look;
\n“I know abaht thee, too!” he answered,
\n“Tha\u2019s \u2018ad it away wi’ a duck!”<\/p>\n
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The county of Lancashire is well known for its monologues. Although a lot of customs and traditions have gone by the wayside, there are still some singers trying to revive them. Some are doing this by writing material in the … Continue reading